Iranian area hypothesized to have water.
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CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. -- In a surprise announcement today, NASA's chief administrator and George W. Bush lookalike Sean O'Keefe revealed that the space agency plans to fly missile-like probes and crash them into Iran to determine if its rugged terrain contains water.
"This is an unprecedented study -- if you don't count our bombing the moon last week," O'Keefe said. "We know that there are three immense bodies of water in areas surrounding Iran, but the evidence is inconclusive whether there is actually water in Iran -- heavy or otherwise -- within their mountains and beneath hundreds and hundreds of feet of hardened, steel-reinforced concrete tunnels."
The United States plans to send these multiple long-range strategic interballistic probes tipped with "scienceheads," likely by next week.
In a press conference this morning, U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said, "This strategic partnership between our missile-like probes and Iran's soil -- which, coincidentally, happens to reside in the exact same places where the Revolutionary Guards process nuclear fuel -- will provide one giant leap forward for finding out just how much water the Islamic Republic has over a quick three-day blitz of research."
