Posted: Partly posted with a 30-percent chance of spelling errors LINCOLN, Neb. -- In a surprise announcement that led to a statewide panic, the Weather Channel reported today that a massive capital letter "H" is headed right for the state of Nebraska.
"Our Doppler 12,000 weather prediction system has never been wrong," said Weather Channel spokesperson Bill Filer. "That big letter H is taller than North Dakota and is headed right for Lincoln, Neb. People need to take cover. This is the big mild drier one!"
The Weather Channel has never predicted a letter H of this size or scope. Its current status is a category-14-point Times New Roman which may increase to a category-18-point Hot and Melty font. However, the Weather Channel reports that Nebraska's army reservists are working with the National Guard on a solution.
"They plan to deploy a giant letter 'L' to chase away the 'H'," Filer added.
